New Year's Resolutions

I challenged myself to write no fewer than 500 words a day this year. I didn’t write anything yesterday, so … that went well.

I’m not going to beat myself up over that one. As an addendum to my New Year’s resolution list, I think I’m going to write: Don’t freak out if you skip a day on something. That’s an important addition as so many of the items on my list concern things I’d like to do with regularity, including:

• Write something every day (6 days a week, 500 words minimum)
• Read every day (social media doesn’t count)
• 3 runs per week
• 3 calls, emails or proposals a day for my training business (minimum)

I guess technically I could stick to the “6 days a week” writing thing if I write on Sunday, my designated day off; but, nah. There’s literally one traditionally manly thing I enjoy and that’s football. This is wild card weekend. I ain’t bein’ productive.

Part of the reason I didn’t write yesterday is that I couldn’t think of anything to write. One of my macro goals for the year is to write a novel, but I’m not at the point of development where I’m ready to get into the meat of daily writing; there’s still a lot of “thinky” things I need to do on that one. I thought about maybe writing a short story (or at least starting one), but I didn’t have any good ideas and didn’t much feel like forcing a bad one.

In the non-fiction arena, my two best options were either a blog entry for Access Communications (my training company) or an article for The Humanist. Access was a no-go for me as I’m not in a great head-space with that company at the moment; I’ve got nothing lined up on the calendar save a freebie speaking engagement in February and a lot of concern about where I’m going with this whole venture. To put that into blog format for a potential client to see struck me as a not particularly savvy business move. As for The Humanist … meh. I’m a little over writing about the absurdity of religion at the moment. Having covered that topic in two plays, a short film and four previous articles for The Humanist, I think I’ve got a good body of work built up there.

So what’s a writer without a project to do? For today at least, the answer is to write in a journal. Journal writing is something I’ve struggled with over the years as I find it hard to write if there is no intended audience. Even writing this, I wonder if I should consider posting it somewhere (editor's note: I posted it somewhere). But who would actually read it (you're not really reading this are you)? And do I necessarily need an audience (apparently I do)? I don’t know (editor's note: I know). What I do know is that I'd like to adhere to the discipline of writing every day. Writing saved me as a youth, and while it ultimately led me toward the theater, it has always remained a major part of my sense of self. A friend once asked me what I would do if I had all the money I would ever need and could choose the labor that had greatest meaning to me, and to my surprise I answered writing -- not acting, not singing, not directing; not any of the things I had been so focused on since deciding where to go to college.

As I dig down and really think about what would make me happy as a vocation, I think writing tops the list. Do I think that’s realistic? No, not in the slightest, which is why I’ll continue to promote my training business and look into other “dollars earning” type stuff. But writing will be a major focus for me this year. I’ve got one short story out to a couple competitions and I intend to hustle to get the first 50 pages of the novel done in time to submit to another competition in March. If by some miracle I were to win, place or show in any of those contests, it would provide a “strike while the iron is hot” kind of moment for me. If not, I’ll keep writing anyway. Surely there are worse ways I could spend my time.